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Just the blunt and honest me. Just someone who needs to air her inner most feelings and thoughts. Just a female who suffers from a crazy life journey, with lots of ups and down in her life. Just another moronic human being who wishes for peace and serenity in life one day.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Two Weeks To Turning 31...

Turning 31 in 2 weeks time... How time flies... It seems like yesterday that I was enjoying my 30th birthday in Bali at Hard Rock Hotel and now, I am nearly reaching 31 soon. I have transited into the 30-ish age and yet, I have yet to achieve my life milestones...

When I was much younger, I always wanted to be a mum of two kids by the age of 30, so that I could go for a hysterectomy (removal of womb) as I hated my menses. Of course, the father of my kids would be someone who loves me as much as I love him. I wanted a happy and complete family. However, such simple dreams were not met. Instead, I went through a hell of divorce at the age of 29 and survived to fall in love unknowingly again but was met with parental disapproval. At age of 30, I am engaged to this guy who loves me more than I love him, however, due to his financial status, we can't get married just yet. 

Although, I have met my career goals by age 30 and even exceeded my own expectations by getting a degree, but, I don't judge my own life based just career and some 'toilet paper' certification, which means absolutely nothing me than just slight monetary happiness. It is also not as if I am earning a $5K salary that I should be rejoicing. My pay is also average as compared to my peers, not that fantastic! 

What I crave in life is not met. What I wished for in my life, didn't come true. What I prayed for feverishly was not answered. 

Now as I am transiting into my 31st age, I shall wish that within the next year, my life goals of having a happy and blissful family would come true. *cross fingers*

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