Long But Fun Day

Last evening 7pm until 3am was spent with two friends of mine whom I haven't manage to meet up for a long long time...

First was my close friend cum 'mei-mei', Vanessa, who is busy with her school life and BGR life to meet up. Thankfully, she managed to squeeze some of her time out from studying for her exams to meet up for dinner at Coffee Club located at White Sands. We had some pastas and mud pie for dessert. Nice! We chit chatted about updates in our life, shared some old memories and 'gossiped' about our other 'mei-mei' in Melbourne who simply refused to come back to Singapore yet. (LOL, CW if you are reading this, hint hint eh...) After dinner, we walked back to her house and I lingered in her house to go through our old TPSS year books to update each other on who's married, have kids and so on... We were also reminising on how much of fun we had back in those days together with my other mei-mei and how our lives have moved on to different paths. I am so glad to have these two buds from TPSS, 11yrs of friendship and more to come...

After meet up with Vanessa, I caught the train from Pasir Ris to Raffles Place to meet up with my RGPS good friend. She knocks off from work only at 12mn as she works in a London bank, thus, the banking timings are to follow the London working hours, which is 3pm to 12mn.

Met her 12.30am at Lau Pa Sat and took a cab down to Jewel Box (Mount Faber) for a chill out chit chat session. The Jewel Box has changed a lot since I last went there 2 years back. It is more condusive and more beautiful with the bar overlooking Sentosa. Such a amazing scene, especially at night, stars glazing down and nice breeze while enjoying music, drinks and food overlooking at the light-up at Sentosa.
We had two cocktails each and Calamari Rings. I had my Grasshopper and Peach Margarita while she had her Long Island Tea and Lychee Martini.

Left the place at around 2.30am and took a cab back. Back home, I bathed and K.O freaking tiredly at around 3am. Although I was tired by I was contented and happy to have met up with my close friends from my Primary and Secondary school life.

After 2 weeks Under My Care

Name: 肥 猫 aka fatty cat (although she is not a cat)


Presenting my hamster after two weeks under my care. She indirectly bullied her other companion and caused her to die of fractured leg. Now she is housed seperately in a cage and I have bought a new hamster, which is a Pearl White Dwarf Hamster.

New Addition @ 4 Weeks Old

Name: No Name Yet... :)(any suggestions are welcome)

Bleeding In Love

Closed off from love
I didn't need the pain
Once or twice was enough
And it was all in vain
Time starts to pass
Before you know it you're frozen

But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melts into the ground
Found something true
And everyone's looking round
Thinking I'm going crazy

But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling

But nothing's greater
Than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face
Yet everyone around me
Thinks that I'm going crazy, maybe, maybe

But I don't care what they say

I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

And it's draining all of me
Oh they find it hard to believe
I'll be wearing these scars
For everyone to see

But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love

Like You'll Never See Me Again

If I had no more time
No more time left to be here
Would you cherish what we had?
Was it everything that you were looking for?
If I couldn’t feel your touch
And no longer were you with me
I’d be wishing you were here
To be everything that I’d be looking for
I don’t wanna forget the present is a gift
And I don’t wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me
‘Cause Lord only knows another day is not really guaranteed

So every time you hold me
Hold me like this is the last time

Every time you kiss me
Kiss me like you’ll never see me again
Every time you touch me
Touch me like this is the last time
Promise that you’ll love me
Love me like you’ll never see me again

How many really know what love is?
No you never will
Do you know until you lose it

That it’s everything that we are looking for
When I wake up in the morning
You’re beside me
I’m so thankful that I found
Everything that I been looking for

I don’t wanna forget the present is a gift
And I don’t wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me
‘Cause Lord only knows another day is not really guaranteed

So everytime you hold me
Hold me like this is the last time
Every time you kiss me
Kiss me like you’ll never see me again
(can you do that for me baby)
Every time you touch me
(see we don’t really know)
Touch me like this is the last time
(see everyday we never know)
Promise that you’ll love me
(I want you to promise me)
Love me like you’ll never see me again
(like you’ll never see me again)

Trip All Planned Out

I am going be away from Singapore for a week during May. Hopefully this trip would help me to have my attention diverted into pure enjoyment instead of harping on the hurtful facts of my current life.
Would be going with my dad to Wu Xi (China) to stay with my uncle and visit my newborn cousin who shares the same birthday as my husband...
Wish me luck... Hopefully I would not die in some air crash or terrorist attacks...

PS: He still doesn't know when I chose to leave on 10 May 2008 and be back only a week later...

1 Mth More

Today marks that I have been tolerating and suffered being in this marriage for nearly 2years. Guess he has forgotten all about it. Being married to him for 1yr and 11mths now and been 1yr plus since he changed into someone whom I fail to recognize, someone whom I can't seem to adapt to. He blames the changes on me and now I have to live with this guilt for the rest of my life or until one day, I can bear it no more and allow this marriage to fail. Many people around me have scolded me and said I am being foolish hanging on but I still love him very much, so much that I can't bear to let him go.
It is very painful to be in this marriage at times, but I do see the light shining into the darkness once in a while (although it doesn't last long). I long for the light to be permernant but guess it may be quite impossible. Frankly, I know it may be silly of me to be loving a husband like him, however, my heart still longs for him.

Today is also supposed to a 1mth countdown before I have my customary marriage as planned years ago. But it has been postponed to 10 May 2009. Now it has been postponed indefinetely... I am learning to be contented to be his wife legally and not customarily. I am still learning to convince myself that there will never be the day I wear a bridal gown to walk down the aisle with this man I love.

This is the power of love, knowing that you are suffering but still bear with it because you know deep down inside your heart, you love and want to be with him for the rest of your life.

I think I would really want to leave town and spend 10 May 2008 somewhere else... I don't wish to be reminded that on 10 May 2008 I am supposed to be wearing the blissful wedding gown, walking hands in hands, stealing occasional glances at the man I love and walking down the aisle with all my close friends and relatives giving me their claps of well-wishes.

I Will Move On, I Will Perservere, I Will Try To Be Strong

This road that I'm taking twists and turns
My life my chance turning dreams into reality
Down this path faced with so many things
Sometimes I feel like giving up and turn away

Can't seem to go on
And I've been thru' this before
Now where am I? Where do I stand?
A little lost here
But I'll remember
All those times you've bought me through
I'd be a fool to give up cos' the goal is near

I'll move on I'll go on
Lord I will take your hand
And you will guide me along
Survive thru' this storm
So I say come what may
I'll hold on to my hope
Yes I will walk down this road
And my passion drive will lead me on

Here I am Once again caught in the rain
Looking back I've come so far and I want to carry on

Take a step a little time it's alright
Even through this rain
I want to smile again

Don't hold back now
And I've been thru' this before
Now where am I? Where do I stand?
A little lost here
But I'll remember
All those times you've bought me thru'
I can feel the sun shining down on me

Here I am Here I am
Lord I will take your hand
And you will guide me along
Survive thru' this storm
So I say come what may
I'll hold on to my hope
Yes I will walk down this road
And my passion drive will lead me on

Happy Birthday...

Happy birthday to him... May I be able to spend many more years of birthdays with him...


Update: Life is getting slightly better as compared to the past weeks ago but it has still not reach where I would like it to be. Customary wedding plans are still of un-mentioned... Praying for improvements to marriage life daily and Thank God that is improvements...

My New Addition

Since I can't seem to conceive humans, I decided to adopt 2 babies... I should treat them as my own kids from this day forth!

I Know Her!!!!!