For those who has been a fan of my previous blog, you would have come across one of my recent blog entry that I have posted dated 23 Dec 2007. The post is with regards to the gamble and bet that I had made with God. I am already expecting to be the ultimate loser in this gamble and although the gamble ain't over yet, it does looks like I am losing.
I know it ain't right for me to be challenging God and I am not even supposed to be making any bets or gamble with Him, but I am just to frustrated with the way He is running my life, my feelings, my moods and my marriage. I am sick and tired of being under His control without feeling much true happiness in my life.
The gamble date would end on 6 Feb 2008 - the first day of CNY. Yes, in two weeks I would know if I am the loser or winner. However, I am already mentally prepared to be the loser.
I can't have the best of the two worlds. He either loses me or He is has to be able to improve my life. I have spent the whole 2007 in dumps and I am sick of that. I am tired of those who has asked me to believe or pray to Him for a miracle or improvement. I have been there, done that with no use at all. I am ready to give up on Him. So if He still does love me as His child, He better do something fast. He has only 2weeks left to prove His love for me, otherwise, He would lose me...
About Me
- Mint + Bitter Chocolate = Heaven
- Just the blunt and honest me. Just someone who needs to air her inner most feelings and thoughts. Just a female who suffers from a crazy life journey, with lots of ups and down in her life. Just another moronic human being who wishes for peace and serenity in life one day.
4 comments:
i remember that post... and i am wondering if what i am thinking the bet is, is what u are betting against God. Hmmmm....
wanna make a guess?
*winks*
i dunno leh it sounds bizarre but then could it be giving up ur religion or something? like being an atheist or changing ur religion. *shrugs* it sounds like it, but there's a high chance i am wrong.
well, u are correct. I am about to give up on believing in Christianity but before I am doing so, I am letting God to prove me wrong. So that why I made a bet with Him.
If He lets me down, I will give up believing in Him.
If He proves me wrong, I am willing to believe in Him forever, never to challenge Him again.
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