6 and a half years has past since that fateful day and there has never been a time that I am reminded of the end of our marriage and relationship. Even down to watching Thai MTV songs or listening to songs, do I not think of what you have put each other through. From the initial first verbal fight as teenagers during polytechnic years, escalating to the physical, emotional and mental abusive relationship cum marriage we had. How you and I ruined each other's idealogy of marriage, how you betrayed the essence of our marriage vows as well as the amount of wasted love I had for you.
If I could return back to those years, I would have done things much differently:
1) I would have not chosen to stay in a sexless marriage
2) I would have not married you
3) I would have chosen the other guys instead of carrying on being in a relationship with you
4) I would have chosen not to be your girlfriend
5) I would have chosen to not let my love for you to overrule my brains
Sometimes I wish I could erase you and our past from my memories. Just wish I could just enter the 'delete' button and I can forget you. Yet, without your indirect lessons, I won't be who I am today, much respectful of myself, my rights and learning to appreciate my current husband even though he isn't perfect.
