About Me

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Just the blunt and honest me. Just someone who needs to air her inner most feelings and thoughts. Just a female who suffers from a crazy life journey, with lots of ups and down in her life. Just another moronic human being who wishes for peace and serenity in life one day.

Monday, June 30, 2014

6 Months Into 2014

What have I achieved for the past 6 months?
1) Promotion as clinical coordinator of G.S (equivalent to a Nurse Clinician / Nurse Manager)
2) Made another 2 enemies/backstabbers who decided to almost create hell for me upon their resignation. (Thankfully my superior is much wiser and didn't buy in their crap! )
3) A little more parental approval for my relationship with my fiancé.

Not much improvement and I am still taking life one step at the time. I guess that I am kinda not expecting anything much this year.
Just taking things as it comes...

Monday, June 23, 2014

Random Post After Hearing A Song


我拿什么拯救
当爱覆水难收
谁能把谁保佑
心愿为谁等待

我拿什么拯救
情能见血封喉
谁能把谁保佑
能让爱永不朽

Loving someone is easy.
Finding someone to love you as much is difficult.

To those who have found that special someone who loves you as much you do love him/her, please treasure him/her.

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Better 2 Be Loved Than 2 Love

Please love me more than I love you.
Please dote on me more than I dote on you.
Please care for me more than I care for you.
Please pamper me more than I pamper you.

Please win my trust.
Please win my parents' trust.
Please prove to me that you are not the same.
Please show me that history will not repeat itself.
Please say you will never let me go.

Please be gentle with my fragile heart.
Please bear with my overbearing character.
Please empathise my low self esteem.
Please understand my need to be possessive.
Please look beyond my cons and find my pros.

Please be the man who you are now forever.
I love you just the way you are.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

So Do I Measure Up?

That was a question my fiancé asked me this evening while he was driving me for our dinner. This topic was brought about as my colleague had commented that us, as a nearly 2 years old couple is still considered new and have still a long way to go to understand each other better.

My fiancé wanted me to compare our relationship to the relationship had with my ex-husband (when we were still dating and he was my bf). My answer was of course my current relationship is way better as compared to my ex husband's. Why? 'Cause, I knew my ex-husband during polytechnic years, when we were still pretty much immatured and didn't know how to handle our relationship properly. Plus, at that time, we both were not working yet and haven't seen the real and practical world. Thus, even before the time relationship hit 2 years old, we were already fighting like kids with immature behaviour and arguments were over petty, trivia matters. We were also unable to solve these petty arguments maturely and ended just sweep all our differences under the carpet.

Now, I am in a relationship, which comprises of respect and compromises. A relationship where I am happy to hold the reins, while my fiancé takes the backseat and vice-versa whenever necessary. I admit that I have always wanted to be the dominant one in a relationship and yet be the pampered one whenever necessary, something that my fiancé has been doing pretty well. He is able to balance out on when to be in charge and when to let me to take charge. He also able to give me the space that I require to handle my strrss and emotions, yet control me in his own subtle manner whenever I get a bit overboard.

My fiancé drives me to work and back, takes the trouble to schedule his work to spend time with me and we take turns to pamper one another. There is mutual respect between us as well as we are both show that commitment to make this relationship work hand in hand.

Of course, our relationship is always smooth sailing and he ain't perfect. But, I believe that it is how we make imperfection to our perfect advantage...

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Perfect? Hell no!

No one is perfect.
No situation is perfect.
Nothing in this world is perfect.
Not even God (He does make mistakes too).

What is perfect for me now?
Having a good job. Having my own house. Having a fulfilled family with 2 kids and a loving husband. Having sufficient money to do whatever I want, whenever I want. Having a husband who does averagely well in his career and works with me equally to support the family. Having parents and parents in law who fully accepts my husband and me. Having absolute time to balance all aspects of my life.
Sadly, like I said, nothing is perfect. I win some, I lose some... But I am sufficiently contented. Life could be better but perfection is a far reached goal. More than a decade ago, I walked the wrong path: chose the wrong person as my husband, made wrong decisions in life due to a moment of fun and pride, committed to a disastrous marriage and loved the wrong man. Now I see the repercussions of my wrong moves...

I just hope no more major wrong moves in future. Hope life would either remain status quo or get better... Amen.